Grounding During A C-PTSD Panic Attack

If you are in that place right now, where your whole body feels coated in shame and your brain is saying things like "you are disgusting," "you are wrong," "you should not exist," take a slow breath.

These thoughts feel brutally true in the moment, but they are not facts. They are trauma responses that were wired into you by long term harm, neglect, or chaos. With C-PTSD, shame can hit as hard as fear. It can feel like your entire self is the problem.

This page focuses on one goal: how to ground yourself in those moments so you can get back to a place where you can think, choose, and care for yourself again.

This is not medical advice.

What is happening when you feel disgusting or like you should not exist?

When C-PTSD shame flares, your nervous system treats you as the threat. Instead of "something out there is dangerous," it becomes "I am the problem."

You might notice:

• A heavy, collapsing feeling in your chest or stomach
• Urges to hide, disappear, or hurt yourself
• Memories of being blamed, humiliated, or ignored
• Thoughts that repeat in absolute terms: "always," "never," "everyone," "no one"

In this state, arguing with the thoughts rarely works. Telling yourself "I am worthy" often bounces right off. Grounding is about coming back into your body and this moment, without trying to solve your whole life in one go.

Step 1: Pause the attack with one neutral sentence

You do not have to jump to self love. Most people with C-PTSD cannot do that in the middle of a shame storm, and that is not a failure. Aim for neutral.

Try something like:

• "I am having a shame flashback."
• "This is a trauma response, not the truth about me."
• "I am a person in a body, in this room, having a really hard moment."

Say it out loud if you can, even if your voice shakes. You are naming what is happening instead of letting the old script run unchecked.

Step 2: Use your senses to anchor in the room

Shame lives in your head and your gut. Grounding uses your senses to prove to your brain that you are here, now.

You can use a 5-4-3-2-1 pattern, but keep it simple and concrete:

• 5 things you can see (objects, colors, shapes, not judgments)
• 4 things you can touch (fabric, floor, chair, your own hands)
• 3 things you can hear (distant traffic, fridge hum, your breathing)
• 2 things you can smell (soap, coffee, even "no smell" counts)
• 1 thing you can taste, or one sentence you repeat that feels tolerable

If "I am worthy" feels fake, choose something lighter, like, "I am still here" or "I exist in this room." You are building a small island of reality under your feet while the shame waves hit.

Step 3: Ground through temperature and touch

Strong shame often comes with a kind of numbness or buzzing. Temperature and pressure can cut through that fog. You are not punishing yourself, you are giving your body a clear, physical signal.

Options you can try:

• Run cold or cool water over your hands and notice the sensation on each finger.
• Hold a mug of warm tea and feel the weight and heat in both hands.
• Press your feet firmly into the floor and push down as if you are trying to leave a footprint.
• Sit back against a chair and notice all the points where your body makes contact.

Name it in your mind: "Cold on my hands," "Warm in my palms," "Pressure under my feet." This gives your brain new data that is not about your worth as a person.

Step 4: Use movement to remind your body you are not trapped

Shame often comes with freeze. You might curl in, stare at a wall, or feel like you cannot move. Tiny movements matter here. You are showing your nervous system that you have options.

Try one or more of these:

• Stand up slowly, look for the door, then look back.
• Stretch your arms above your head and then let them drop.
• Gently push your hands against a wall or table and feel your muscles work.
• If you are lying down, press your heels into the bed or floor.

Tell yourself, "I can move. I am not stuck in that old situation, even if my body remembers it like I am."

Step 5: Choose one kinder voice, not the kindest possible voice

When you feel disgusting or like you should not exist, it is unrealistic to jump straight into "I love myself." You do not need that level of kindness to start shifting out of the spiral. You just need a voice that is less cruel than the one in your head.

Examples:

• Instead of "I should not exist," try "I exist, and I am in pain right now."
• Instead of "I am disgusting," try "I am a human body that has been through things."
• Instead of "Everything is my fault," try "Some things happened to me that were not my fault."

If it helps, imagine speaking to a younger version of you or to a friend who has been through similar things. Most people cannot say to others what was said to them. Let that difference matter.

Step 6: Using your phone or an app as a grounding ally

Your phone can make shame worse if you start doomscrolling or comparing yourself to everyone else. It can also be a tool if you set it up on a better day.

You might:

• Save a note with your neutral grounding sentences and a simple 5-4-3-2-1 script.
• Pin photos of places, animals, or people that feel safe or steady.
• Use an app like Unpanic that walks you through breathing, grounding, and crisis options without toxic positivity.

The goal is not to stare at the screen for an hour. The goal is to have a pre built path for "I feel disgusting and unreal" so you do not have to figure it out from scratch while in distress.

When to reach for human help

Grounding can reduce the intensity of shame, but it is not supposed to carry everything alone. Reach out for human support if:

• You are thinking about hurting yourself or you have a plan
• The feeling of "I should not exist" is getting stronger instead of easing
• Shame is making it impossible to work, study, care for yourself, or connect with anyone
• You feel completely alone with memories you have never told anyone

This might mean a crisis line, a trusted friend, a therapist, a peer support group, or a local mental health service. C-PTSD is heavy. You are not meant to carry it by yourself or "be strong enough" to never need help.

Building your own shame grounding plan

On a day that feels at least somewhat okay, write out a tiny plan you can use next time a shame storm hits:

1. One neutral sentence you can say out loud.
2. One sensory grounding sequence you know you can do.
3. One movement you can manage, even if it is just pressing your feet into the floor.
4. One phone action that helps, such as opening a grounding app or reading your own note.
5. One person or service you can contact if the thoughts about not existing keep getting louder.

You did not choose to develop C-PTSD, and you did not choose the shame that came with it. You can choose small, practical ways to stay here when your brain insists you should disappear. That choice is not about being positive. It is about giving yourself a chance to keep going.